Society for Aesthetic Deletions

***Dave has introduced a new concept, the Thursday Thumb-Twiddler!

1. Have you ever bought, worn someplace, then returned a new outfit, knowing ahead of time that's what you were planning to do?
Nope. I don't often buy new clothes, so when I do, I want them for a specific purpose. I did buy one dress and return it right afterwards, but that was because it got ripped and I wanted to wear it again. The replacement ripped when I wore it the next time, too. I think I'm just too fat for the dress. I need to shed more poundage before I wear it again.

2. When you do something stupid, how much does it bother you to have other folks laugh at you?
Oh, lots. But it really depends on the situation. If I was totally clueless as to how stupid I was being, then I get really upset when I'm made fun of. But if I had a clue as to how stupid it was and I did it anyway, I can laugh at myself, too. I wish I could think of an example here. Maybe if I come up with one, I'll update it.

3. When were you last in a fight? What was it about, and did you win?
Fistfight? I couldn't tell you, probably something when I was young with my sisters. I didn't ever fight in school (that I recall).

Argument-type fight? I'm sure Lou and I fought about something, and I probably won. I'm more likely to argue/fight with him than he is with me, and he'll give in. Of course, I know I'm right, so I keep at it until I am proven wrong. (chuckle)

1. With a poof of inky black smoke, the Devil appears before you and offers you long years of success and fortune, all in exchange for that little intangible he calls your soul. Do you prick your finger and sign on the dotted line?
No, most likely not. While a few years of happiness and fortune etc. would be cool, it wouldn't make up for eternal torment afterwards.

Even if I believed in such things.

2. If you walked out of your house tomorrow morning and saw a bird with a broken wing huddled in some nearby bushes, what would you do?
Since there are no bushes nearby...okay, that's a cheap shot.

I would try to figure out if I could get at the bird, if it would let me. If so, then I'd bring it to our vet, and let them deal with it. Otherwise, I'd probably leave it be.

3. What's the best use you can think of for snow?
Building a snowman, snow balls for throwing, and sledding. All sorts of fun with snow.

1. Would you remain in a marriage if you found out your mate had had an affair? What if it had happened more than once?
Oh $diety, $diety, tough question!

I think that I would stay in the marriage if it happened once, provided my spouse was willing to work things through with me. More than once, no. There is obviously something seriously wrong with the relationship if they have an affair more than once, and they may be just looking for a way out.

I used to say that if my spouse cheated on me, the cops would have to look hard to find the body. But having been married now for five (yipe!) years, I wouldn't immediately go for the jugular. I'd be hurt, sure, who wouldn't be? (someone who wanted out of the marriage, perhaps) But I would want to know why. I'd be more likely to try to work things out, see if the relationship could be salvaged.

2. If you knew that if you devoted yourself to any single occupation -- music, writing, acting, business, politics, medicine, etc. -- and be among the best and most successful in the world, what would you choose?Writing. I love acting, but I don't think I could take the boredom (on movie or TV sets, not the theater), or the stage fright. If I could devote myself to writing, that'd be my chosen profession. I'd like to inspire others to write, too.

3. What word or short phrase should people say more often?
Frell. It's just such a good swear word. Frelling dren is also especially good.

1. If you had the knowledge, would you inform your mate (or a parent) that they have an incurable disease? Or would you try to keep the truth from them (assume they are in full command of their faculties) for as long as possible?
I'd tell them. I really think there is nothing to be gained from hiding information from someone, other than pain when/if they find out. Besides, then neither of us would have to suffer alone.

2. If you had a choice of one intimate "soulmate" and no other close friends, or of no such soulmates and many friends and acquaintances, which would you choose?
Soulmate, without question.

I am, as my husband has coined the phrase, rabidly independent. While I love my friends and acquaintances, I could live without them. I wouldn't like it, but I could do it.

But I couldn't live without my husband. He's my other half, my soulmate, my best friend. Without him, I dwell in darkness. (sorry for the Willow reference!)

3. Which sport would you most like to play professionally?
I don't know that it'd be defined as "play," but I would love to do three-day eventing. It was the equestrian focus of my riding days and my college major. I love the dressage, and though I've never done a real cross country course, I'd love to give it a go. And stadium jumping is old-hat to me.

1. You receive notification of jury duty. Do you go willingly, or do you try and find some way to beg off (or get yourself disqualified)? What if you were told that the case you were being impaneled for might go on for months?
I go. Been there, done that. Even if it was for months and I'd be sequestered.

I served on a jury for two weeks. Criminal case. Defendent fled before we could find him guilty, so we convicted him in absentia. Still don't know if they caught him or not.

2. Would you be willing to give up sex for one year if you knew it would give you a much deeper sense of peace than you have now?
Deeper sense of peace? Hell no.

If my giving up sex for a year made everyone in the world live in peace, then yes.

But just to give me a deeper sense of peace? I'm already pretty much at peace with myself, so I don't need that, thankyouverymuch.

3. What's the most violent television show you watch? What about the most sexually graphic?
Violent? Oh, probably Buffy, which isn't that violent (IMNSHO). Maybe Angel.

Buffy again for sexually graphic. Especially this past season of Buffy, all those Spike and Buffy scenes.

If we got Showtime, the latter would probably resolve to Queer As Folk, which I want to watch, but not enough to pay for it. And I'd have to tape it anyway, as it's on late and not something Lou wants to see at all.

1. Would you rather die peacefully among friends at 50, or painfully and alone at 80? Assume that most of those thirty years would be "good" ones.
Peacefully at 50. I don't like pain much when it's happening (who does?), but I tend to forget it when it's gone. Still, I don't see the case for 30 more years if I'm going to be in pain. I could deal with the alone thing.

2. Your teen arrives home one night with a big dent in his car fender. You find out the next day there was a hit-and-run in the neighborhood. Would you try to find out if your kid was involved? If you found out s/he was, would you notify the authorities? What if there was a death from the hit-and-run?
Yes, and yes. Even if a hit-and-run. There is no way that it'd not be caught by the police - covering it up would make it worse. I'd want my kid to fess up to me, to be able to do so with the understanding that I'd be behind him/her all the way, helping them through it all. But you have to take responsibility for your actions, otherwise it'll bite you in the ass, in more ways than one.

3. What would the title of your autobiography be (not including your name)?
Oh dear, I have no clue. (chuckles), okay, would that work as a title? No, I know what I'd use.

The Words That Got Away.

Yeah, I like that.

Methinks someone's been watching 1776 recently...

1. "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness." Bombastic claptrap, overly-sentimental romanticism, or profound truth?
Somewhere between all three, I think.

It's wordy, romanticized, yet profound. They over-worded everything in those days, but a simple statement wouldn't have been enough.

2. Thomas Jefferson originally included a condemnation of slavery in the DoI, but the Continental Congress was faced with the defection of the southern colonies if the clause was not withdrawn. Should Jefferson and the others have compromised on such a principle?
Should they have? Absolutely not.

But there was no way the South would have compromised, so they had to.

I do wonder, if the South had relented, what would have happened. Would the Civil War never have happened? What if the South had not relented, but neither had the North? Unanimity was required (I am watching 1776 right now as I type this) for the independence resolution to have passed.

I think, based on my little knowledge of this time, that if independence had not been declared, the country would have split apart earlier, fighting against itself as well as the British, and most likely have lost.

So while I think it terrible that the condemnation of slavery was removed from the declaration, I don't see how it would have passed otherwise. And we never would have gained our independence.

3. The signatories to the DoI were committing treason against the Crown by taking such a stand. They concluded the document with, "And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor." Do you have a cause or belief for which you would be willing to put your "life, fortune and honor" on the line?
My husband. My family. His family. A few select friends. But that's about it.

Oops. Forgot about this.

1. Would you prefer to be blind or deaf?
Deaf. If I had a choice to pick, that is.

I'm very very very nearsighted with a bad astigmatism in one eye. But I could not live without being able to see. I could deal (not well, but I think I could do it) with being deaf.

2. If you could transfer to your mate the one trait that you possess that you wish s/he did, what would it be?
This one took a lot of thought. But I think it finally comes down to this: my technical know-how. I'd love for him to be able to "get" all the stuff I do with computers and VCRs and receivers and hooking up the PS2, etc. He could do it if he had to and had the time (and the patience), but he doesn't care to learn. Especially as he has me. (grin)

Then maybe he'd understand my desire for TiVo/ReplayTV.

3. If you could fly in a hot air balloon over any city in the world, what city would you choose?
Oooh, fun question! I always wanted to go up in a hot-air balloon.

But a city, eh? Hrm. It'd have to be an old one, one with history. Venice? No. Paris? Maybe. Athens? Possibly. Giza? Ooh, definitely up there.

But right now, I pick Cuzco, Peru. If we can drift over Machu Picchu as well. I'd love to see those ruins and the mountainsides from high up. Oh yeah.

1. One hot summer afternoon, while walking through a parking lot at a large shopping mall, you notice a dog suffering badly from the heat inside a locked car. What would you do?
I must admit, catching up on people's blogs gave me pause to reconsider my first answer.

I would probably make Lou go inside the mall and have the car's license paged, while I waited outside, cell phone at the ready, keeping an eye on the dog.

I would also try the car's doors, to see if I could open any to let the window down a bit.

If I hadn't heard back from Lou, I'd consider breaking a window, but would probably chicken out and call the police and/or mall security to do it for me. And remind them of how bad a penalty there is for such animal neglect.

2. You are in a restaurant rest room. You notice an employee leaving without washing his/her hands. Do you bring the matter to the attention of the owner or manager? If so, do you do it publicly or privately?
To be honest, I probably wouldn't even notice. I don't tend to look at everyone else while in the washroom, I get in and get out. But if I did notice, I would probably tell Lou, who might say something privately. I don't think I ever would. If the restaurant was not a prime favorite, I doubt I'd return to it.

3. What is one item you own that you really should throw away ... but probably never will?
I am a packrat. I keep tons of crap. I did get rid of letters and cards from my old boyfriend a few years back, though in retrospect I wish I'd have kept them.

But I really should throw out my Duran Duran collection of things. I'd keep the records (maybe sell them on eBay if I can get CDs burned of them...once I find them again), but I also have magazines and articles and tons of crap in a footlocker.

But if I were to go in there to throw them out, I'd start looking at them all, and just never find the time/ability to actually do it.

Lou, on the other hand...

1. You've been diagnosed with a presently incurable disease, with no more than three months to live. If you had a modest chance of surviving cryogenic freezing in the next week, to be awakened in a thousand years to live a greatly extended life ... would you do it?
No. At one time, I might have said yes, but while I'd have a long life, all my friends and relatives would be gone. I don't think I'd want to do that. I'd live those last three months to the fullest.

2. A friend asks for your opinion about an original novel (painting, sculpture, song) they've created. You think it is utterly dreadful. Do you lie about it, diplomatically tone down your true feelings, or tell the complete, unvarnished truth?
I'm known for telling the complete, unvarnished truth (at least I think I am), so I would probably fall somewhere in between the diplomatically toning down my feelings and telling the truth.

Because what I would say is that while it doesn't appeal to me and it is not my cup of tea, there are probably others who would love it. If they asked for true criticism, then I would let them have it, no holds barred. But most people can't take criticism (me included!), so I'd only do it if they really pushed or asked me for my opinion, and weren't looking for me to just praise it, as so many might.

3. In honor of the weather, what do you think is the most enjoyable thing to do in the snow?
Build snowmen, have snowball fights. Basically play in it!

1. If you could (a) prevent an earthquake in Peru that will kill 40,000, (b) a crash at an airport near you that will kill 200, or (c) an automobile accident that will kill an acquaintance of yours, which one would you choose to avert?
Just an acquaitance, as the question asks, I'd have to go with preventing the earthquake. But hey, I've got superpowers if I can stop the earthquake, right? So I could probably do all of it. Hee.

2. You're engaged to someone in a distant city, but find yourself physically attracted to someone who lives close by. Would you have an affair with this person, if you knew there was no chance it would ever be discovered?
An affair? No, because that would be cheating. Engaged or married, you've made a commitment to this one person, and it's not good to cheat. It will haunt you forever.

Now, if you're into open marriages, that changes things. I have a friend whom I once asked if he would ever get married. His reply was yes, as long as he could still sleep with other people. There you have it.

3. If someone were to give you a $100 gift certificate for your birthday, what store would you want it from?
Store huh? Not restaurant? If restaurant, I'd ask for that $100 toward dinner at Not Your Average Joe's. Appetizer, meal, and dessert. And wine. Yum.

But if for merchandise, I think I'd have to go with Amazon. Wow, that wishlist needs to be updated.

1. You are a state legislator. An industry group offers you a sizable, but legal, political donation, "no strings attached," while you have a bill they favor up before you. Do you accept the donation, or reject it?
Nope, I do not accept the donation. I'll take it after the bill has passed or been rejected, though. But not while it's still being decided.

2. While reading a new book by a famous scholar, whose previous work you've very much admired, you come across multiple passages that seem familiar. You do some digging around and find where the scholar has lifted, almost verbatim and without credit, all those passages from an obscure work by another author. What, if anything, do you do?
I tell my husband and my friends, probably post it on my blog, but I don't do anything else. I'd probably not be the first one who noticed this, I'd imagine.

3. If you were to be forced to have the same thing for dinner every night for a month, what would you choose?
Oooh, tough call. My first pick would be steak or prime rib, but all that beef would kill me after a while. Literally!

I think I'd have to go with pasta. Can I pick different sauces? If not, then I'd go with marinara, very little meat. And a salad. And bread and butter. Mmmm....bread...

1. How do you react when people sing "Happy Birthday" to you in a restaurant?
Doesn't happen. Lou *hates* that, and told me flat out when we started going out that I was never to do that to him, because he'd get up and walk out of the restaurant.

And I believe him. So since I don't do it to him, he doesn't do it to me.

Now, that said, it *has* happened in the past. And I do sing along (or whatever) if I'm at a restaurant and someone at another table gets put on the spot. I enjoy it, I smile, and hopefully eat whatever free dessert they have given me.

2. The cashier gives you change for a twenty, even though you paid with a five. Do you keep the extra money, or return it?
Did I notice it? If I know it, I would give it back. If I didn't notice it until we were out of the restaurant or much later, I wouldn't do anything about it. Most likely, I'd think that I was wrong in the bill I'd handed them, thinking it my memory, not theirs.

We're always pretty good at restaurants in making sure that we've got the right amount on the bill - our regular place for breakfast on weekends, Persy's Place, shortchanged themselves on the bill a few times in the early days when we went there, and we corrected it.

However, if I've had crappy service, then I keep it and walk out.

3. What do you think is the best conversation piece in your house?
Wow. I don't know. We don't do conversation pieces.

Though it'd probably be our book collection. We have about 8 bookshelves in various places around the house, and most of them are filled to jamming with books. Four of them are rpg books *only*, the others are our various flavors of fiction. We also have one bookshelf reserved for hardcovers.

1. If you were to discover that your closest friend is a heroin dealer, what would you do?
Frelling dren, start with the easy ones next time! You scared the dren out of me! It's too early in the morning for this...

Okay, okay. I'd talk to her about it first, telling her that I know, and that she needs to stop. I know it's a good source of income and it's (sort-of) keeping my husband employed, but it is wrong.

Then I'd tell the police.

By the way, I can't answer this for my main closest friend, Lou, because he deals with addicts in the OTHER end of this. There's no way in HELL that he'd deal. So, sorry Anne! :)

2. Having learned to a moral certainty that the world is going to end in six months, what one thing would you do for the first time?
Skydive. I've always wanted to jump from a plane.

3. If you could create a memorial to yourself in a city park, what would it be?
A stand of birch trees, maybe in a nice circle. A plaque could be in the middle of it, saying my name my birth and death dates. Maybe a quote or a bit from Robert Frost's Birches poem.

"One could do worse than be a swinger of birches."

1. You're helping raise money for a charity, and someone pledges a very large contribution if you'll perform, on stage, at the upcoming fund-raising show. There will be about 1,100 people in the audience. Would you be willing to perform? If so, what sort of act would you prefer to do?
Sure! I'd do it in a heartbeat.

I'd act. Take some scene from something, and do it. I've not done any acting since college, and that very little. But I also did a lot in high school, and had a blast.

2. Have you ever cheated in a game (like a card game) for money?
I don't play games for money, so, no. But if I had, I probably would be tempted and would if I thought I could get away with it. However, it's not likely I would be able to get away with it - I have a terrible fear of being caught. So I don't do a lot of things I might. It's the Catholic guilt upbringing.

3. If you could go back in time and relive any moment in your life exactly as it happened, what event would you choose to experience again?
Oh dear. No, wait, I've got it.

The morning that I asked Lou to marry me. Oh, yeah. I'd experience that again.

1. How do you picture your funeral?
I don't want one.

I want my organs to be donated, and my body cremated, and the ashes placed in the dirt where a birch tree is planted, hopefully on my own yard or a family member's.

Then I'd like people to have a party where they can remember me and tell each other stories about me and cry and laugh and be there for each other, and for Lou. Because if I'm dead and he's not, he is SO going to need that support.

2. As a juror, you are sworn to not discuss with anyone the details of the trial you're impaneled for. Do you (would you) anyway?
No, I wouldn't. I've been there, I've done that. And I did not speak at all until it was all over.

That said, if I would be tempted, it would be to talk with Lou about it. But he understands the need for privacy (it's a big thing with is job, though not so much as when he worked at the opiate clinic), so he wouldn't pressure me to talk either.

3. Would you rather live someplace where it's always between 80-90 degrees F both day and night, or someplace where it's always 40-50 degrees F? (For you metric types, that's 26-32C or 4-10C.)
Oh, 80-90, please! I love the warmth. I'd miss being able to curl up cozy in front of a fireplace, but I'd deal.

As long as it's not too humid, or too dry. We need to take the humidity level into account here.

1. If you knew that in one year you would die, suddenly, how would you change anything about the way you are now living?
I'd take more risks. Go skydiving, like I said before. Do all the things I have wanted to do but couldn't. However, I would really try to not drop myself into so much debt doing said things that my loved ones are paying for it YEARS later.

2. Your father-in-law is foreign-born, and you've just learned that he was an agent of long-standing for a nation that is very unfriendly toward yours. Do you report him to the authorities? Is your answer any different if he's still acting as an agent?
If he was an agent and is no more, I would think about it, but probably not. I'd discuss it with my husband, and figure out what we should do together.

If I knew that he was still an agent, yes, I would report him. I would still talk about it with my husband, so he would know my thoughts. But it wouldn't stop me from reporting him if my husband didn't want me to.

3. If you could stand at the pinnacle of any man-made or natural object, what would it be?
I'd love to stand at the top of Mt. Everest. But only if I could get there and down without all the in-between steps.

1. If, by sacrificing your life, you could contribute so much to the world that you would be honored in all nations ... (a) would you be willing to do so? (b) would you be willing to do so if someone else you thoroughly despise would get all the credit while you went unrecognized?
I'm assuming that by "contribute so much" I'm doing something like curing cancer or somesuch. Honor's not that important to me, so I'd do it in both cases. I'd know I did a job well done, who cares if someone knows?

I work in tech support. Often I'm thanked for doing things that were of no real import (like recreating someone's deleted calendar). And I'm not thanked for doing thing that take me hours of my own time. (no Kate, this does not refer to YOU...you thank and appreciate me all the time!)

So honor and glory don't mean a lot to me.

2. You discover, unexpectedly, that a former friend (who you no longer like) has given your name as a character reference for a job application. The ex-friend is qualified for the job, but do you give them an honest thumbs-up?
Yes, I would. I can't say that I wouldn't drop hints about whatever issue caused our friendship to break up (if I thought it was his/her fault, and not my own), but if it was a job they could do, I'd tell them that they could.

I would not hesitate to mention flaws in the ex-friend's personality if asked, though.

3. If you could write a sequel to any movie you wanted, what movie would it be?
This is a tough question. Most of the movies I've seen that I can think to sequalize already have sequels.

I think, in the interest of answering this today, I'm going to have to go with my first answer. The Last Starfighter. Just imagine what we can do to that movie with the technology today. Though we'd be without Robert Preston. *sniff*

1. You're driving late at night through a deserted but safe neighborhood. Suddenly, a dog darts out in front of your car and you hit it. Do you stop to see how injured it is? If you found it was dead, and had a tag with the owner's address and phone number, what would you do?

It would probably depend, as much as I hate to say it. If I thought I had really hit it head on, I don't think I would stop. I would not be able to handle it - I'd be an emotional wreck.

But if I had just clipped it, I would try to stop and find the dog. If I had a tag, I'd pull out the cellphone and try and call the home.

If I had found it dead, I still would call. I'd want someone to do the same for me. But then again, I wouldn't leave my dogs out to roam the neighborhood (ahem!).

2. Your job makes you privy to the fact that your company is illegally dumping toxic material. An anonymous tip to the authorities isn't likely to produce any results. Do you risk your job by publicly bringing your firm's crimes to the attention of the authorities?

Hell yes I would! I can find a job elsewhere. I do not want to attribute to the dumping of toxic chemicals, even by not reporting it.

But how an educational research department at Brown would be dumping toxic chemicals is beyond me.

3. If you were sent on assignment to rate the ten best small towns in America, what particular criteria would be the most important to you?

Friendliness of the people would be on the list. Scenery - small towns have to have nice scenery. I can't think of anything else right now to put on the list.

1. An eccentric millionaire offers to donate a very large sum to a charity of your choosing (other than you) if you'll step, completely naked, out of a car onto a busy city street, walk four blocks through the noontime traffic, and climb back into the car. Knowing that you would be in no physical danger, would you do it?

Yes, I would. It'd have to be a million dollars or more, but I certainly would.

Besides, Lou would be so busy blinding everyone who looked at me that I wouldn't have to worry about anything. :)

2. As a follow-up to the above, how would you rank the following in terms of relative unpleasantness -- (a) a nude stroll in public, (b) being spat upon by a crowd of people, (c) being arrested for shoplifting at a crowded store, (d) begging for money in a public place.

Unpleasantness? For me, I'm assuming?

If so, then it'd have to be b, c, d, and a.

3. Enough unpleasantness. If you could travel back in time to meet anyone in your family's history, who would it be?

Hrm...good question. It would probably have to be my mother's grandfather, on her mother's side. According to family legend, he got his family out of Austria (fleeing the war) and had to kill a soldier to do it. He never entered a church again, since he had killed a man.

I'd love the chance to meet and talk to him about it all.

1. Does not having done something before make it more appealing, or less?

Depends on what it is (chuckle). It can, but if it's something gross, then there's a reason why I haven't done it before, right? Like eating a rotten banana.

But something like dancing with my honey at the top of a skyscraper on a warm summer evening....oh yeah, that's appealing.

2. If you could have a large stain-glass window in your house, what would you want it to depict?

I'd want it to be abstract, to not picture anything in particular. Just colored pieces of glass. Then I'd sit back and watch people try to figure out what it was depicting.

Yeah, I'm evil that way.

3. A change of pace. What five TV series have or had the best instrumental theme song?

Oh, instrumental only, eh? There goes most of my trivia knowledge, you know...

Does Star Trek count? They had narration over the theme. I'd put in a vote for DS9 anyway, they didn't have narration.

Miami Vice. In its time, it was very catchy, and it pretty much *screams* the 80's generation, which is my generation, baby!

Angel. I love the haunting strings on that, even better than the Buffy theme. Though that theme rocks too.

Remington Steele. Loved the sexy, swanky theme. And having Pierce Brosnan doesn't hurt, either.

Oh, and I have to throw one in here for an old favorite. Barney Miller. I love that theme song!

Honorable mentions to the A-Team and M*A*S*H, though the latter actually *has* words, they just don't sing them in the series.

1. You're at a friend's house for Thanksgiving dinner. You find a dead cockroach in your salad. What do you do?

Well, considering that each Thanksgiving for just about as long as I can remember I've been at my friends' house for Thanksgiving, I'd wonder which of the kids or adults put it there, because some of them read my blog (waves to Grant, Jack, Lou, Alex).

Then I'd kindly point it out, remove it, and check for other bug bits. Then I'd eat it.

The salad. Not the cockroach.

2. What particular historical document (or portion thereof) do you think every person (or at least every citizen of your country) should know by heart?

The Declaration of Independence. I can put it to music if you want, it'll help you remember.

3. A follow-on to last week: what five TV series have or had the best theme song with lyrics?

Oh now, this is going to be tough.

Animaniacs. Oh yes, number one. Totally Insane-y.

I went and browsed through some other responses before picking any more. So now I've got two more...

Banana Splits. Tra la la, lala la la, tra la la, lala la laaaaaaaaah! Yeah, baby!

Greatest American Hero. Look at what's happened to me, I can't believe it myself. *nods vigorously*

Now, I'm going here to refresh my memory for songs.

The Addams Family. I'll skip the rendition here, but I expect everyone to be snapping at home.

Oh crap. I have a tie for fifth place. Okay, okay, here's #5.

The original MST3k theme. Not the one with Mike, but the first season broadcast on The Comedy Channel (before it merged with Ha! and became The Comedy Network). Which means it also has Larry and not Frank in the credits.

Honorable mention to: It's Garry Shandling Show (how can not love a theme song that is self-referential?), Facts of Life (1st and 2nd+ seasons), Cheers, South Park, Wierd Al, Mad About You, The Young Ones, The Dukes of Hazzard, The Life and Times of Grizzly Adams, Wonder Woman, Moonlighting, 21 Jump Street, George of the Jungle, Top Cat, Underdog, Fraggle Rock, The Electric Company, Land of the Lost (what else could have a character named after it in Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back?), The Muppet Show, Earthworm Jim, The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, and all of the Drew Carey themes.

1. If you were able to take a one-month trip anywhere in the world, with money and vacation time no object, where would you go and what would you do?

Do I have to go to just one place? *whines* Okay, I'd do Australia and New Zealand. I'd tour the countryside, see the outback and the colorful NZ countryside. Pop about in the big cities, go visit the Great Barrier Reef, and just generally relax and have fun.

2. How do you react to people who talk loudly while the movie is playing?

I turn and glare, then let Lou handle it. He's much more imposing than I am.

3. What meal do you look forward to the most?

Dinner. I love dinner. Breakfast during the week is quick, and lunches haven't been the same since WW. But dinner is my favorite meal.

Or did you mean something like a holiday meal? If that's the case, then I love the "family reunion" meals at my mom's house, when she makes all the stuff that is bad for us but we love since we had it as kids - fried chicken, au gratin potatoes, roast beef, and such. The meals can be when my brother is visiting (Jerry lives in Kansas, the rest of my siblings live in New England) or at holiday meals, though the fried chicken is usually not prepared then.

I also love dinners with my mom and Lou. My mom will have us over every few months or so, because Lou and she, and she and me, share the same love of some foods. Lou and Mom love sausage and sauerkraut, Mom and I love salmon patties.

Damn, now I'm hungry. And it's only 9:00 a.m.!

1. Would you prefer to have had more or fewer sexual partners in your life?

More, but not a LOT more. Just one or two. There's a reason why, but I won't share it because that might embarrass some of the men in my life who read this blog. *waves at Lou, Alex*

2. You accidentally come across your teenager's diary. If you choose to, you can read it without anyone ever knowing. Do you? What if it were your spouse's?

I'd only read my teenager's diary if I had cause to be concerned about something, that he/she was keeping something from me that made me concerned for their health/safety - drug use, sexual promiscuity - but otherwise no.

As for my spouse - it'd be tempting, but no, I don't think I would.

3. You work for an ad agency, and the assignment is to come up with a slogan to get people to eat more fish. What would you suggest?

There are reasons I don't work for an ad agency. That said:

Fish is food for your brain.

See?

1. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?

I wish my parents talked to me about their lives more. Even a "What I did today" recap at dinner or something like that would work for me. I don't really know what my dad did for a living, other than was some kind of engineer for IBM and was subcontracted out to work for NASA on a variety of projects.

And I'd love to know how my mother managed to raise all 7 of us without going insane, with little help from my father.

2. Have you ever displayed in your home a hated, ugly, and useless gift, just because the donor happened to be paying you a visit?

Nope. I guess my friends all have taste. :)

3. If you were writing a new children's book, what might you choose for the setting, and who might the main character be?

I don't know, I'm not a children's writer. But probably a young girl, in a fantasy setting.

1. Would it disturb you much if, upon your death, your body were simply thrown into the woods and left to rot? Why?

It would depend on how I died, or why. If it was from murder, then yes, it'd bother me. If it's the future way of disposing bodies, then I don't think so.

To quote Yoda - "Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter." My spirit/soul has passed, the body is an empty shell.

Oh, and I'd also regret that my organs wouldn't be donated, which I have elected to have done after I die.

2. The head of the Postal Service calls you up and tells you that you've been chosen at random to create a postage stamp with anyone or anything on it. What would you choose?

Oh, I don't know. Lou said he'd put a d20, with the 20 on top, of course. I think I'd do some sort of abstract art. Ooh, how about a Salvadore Dali stamp? Some of his art would be really funky. Of course, they've probably already done that...

So I'll go with a birch tree. In New England, a series of them. Spring, Summer, Autumn, and Winter.

3. What's the longest line you've ever stood in?

Time or length? Length, I think it'd have to be when I saw The Empire Strikes Back, lo those many years ago. Time, it'd probably be waiting to see Episode I. While I didn't camp out, I think we were two hours early.

In chatting with Lou, he's reminded me of the HUGE line at GenCon this year for prereg, which beats all lines hands down. And the lines at amusement parks are long, but they're hard to tell, because they wrap so much. The line for the Batman: The Ride roller coaster at Six Flags in New Jersey was really long, time and length-wise.

1. Which would you prefer: a wild, turbulent life filled with joy, sorrow, passion, and adventure -- both intoxicating successes and stunning setbacks? Or a happy, secure, predictable life surrounded by friends and family, without such wild swings of fortune and mood?

The former, actually. I don't think I could take the staid life. Not that my life is all full of adventure, mind you. But I like the unpredictable. Most of the time.

Like yesterday. When the van decides that it doesn't want to shift (it's an automatic) out of 3rd gear on the way back from campus (I found a meter this time with an hour and 20 minutes still on it, after two circles of the streets. Whoo-hoo!). And then taking it to Firestone, hoping we don't need a new transmission on a van that's only THREE YEARS OLD, and hoping also that we don't have to rent a van for our trip to North Carolina on SATURDAY! THIS SATURDAY! Panic ensued, but it turns out it's only a speed sensor that went flaky, and though it cost us $180 for repair ($40 part, the rest to replace it, because Chrysler's minivans have terribly service-inaccessible engines.), we get to take the van to NC after all.

Last year the front brakes went while we were in Cary. This year, we got that all taken care of at the beginning of the month (prior to the trip to Manassas) to the tune of $700ish.

But see? If no panic, then it'd have just been boring, secure, predictable. Though car problems in November are almost starting to be predictable...

2. Sometimes whistles are blown to warn us or get our attention. When would you most like to have a whistle blow to alert you?

When I need to do something at work. I'm good if I have it written down on the calendar, but if you call me or stop me in the hall, I'll forget by the time I get back to my office or turn back to the computer to do something else. My memory sucks that way these days.

3. A picture is worth a thousand words. What is one place you have seen that only a picture can adequately describe?

Trinity College's Long Room. Saw it while on tour of England, Ireland and Wales. Didn't spend near enough time in it.

1. Would you like to know the precise date of your death?

No, I don't think so. Because then I'd be worried about it, or try to cram too much stuff in before it. I prefer not to know.

2. Do you have a favorite sexual fantasy? Would you like to have it fulfilled? (Details are not necessary in your answer.)

A favorite? At a particular time, yes. But it changes. I don't have one particular fantasy. Plus, when they get fulfilled, I move on to another one. *winks*

3. If you had to be trapped in a TV show for a month, which show would you choose? Consider the setting, the characters, the lifestyle, etc.

After some thought, I think I'd have to go with Star Trek: The Next Generation. On the Enterprise, with Riker the womanizer (hubba-hubba!), Data, Barclay, Jean-Luc Picard. Oh, and the holodecks. Oh yes, I'd be a candidiate for Holodiction, big time!

Plus, TNG didn't bleed crewmen so much as TOS did. DS9 pretty much boldly stays where it has always stayed (yes, I know they moved it). It did have Avery Brooks and Andrew Robinson (whom I've met!), and I've heard it got better again near the end, I still think I'd prefer TNG. Never liked Voyager much.

Buffy and Firefly and Babylon 5 and Alias are all cool, but way too deadly. Ed and West Wing are fun and quirky, but only if you're really involved with what's going on.

And I'd do Survivor. In a heartbeat. Since I already applied once (and didn't hear back at all), I would still do it.

1. Christmas cards -- how many do you send out? Is there an obligation to reciprocate if you receive one? How do you display the ones you receive, assuming you display them at all?

Let's see...I think this year it was about 40, maybe a little less.

We put the ones we get up on the high railing around our kitchen/entryway. It's about eye height, and we can usually put the back of the card in the space between the ledge and the wall. (I'd call it wainscoting but that's really not what it is.)

2. If money were no object, would you hire a personal shopper to do your Christmas shopping for you?

No. I love doing Christmas shopping! Most of mine was done online this year. That's probably why I love it.

3. As a late night talk show host, you need to book a guest for your December 23rd show who is highly relevant to the Christmas season. Whom would you choose? (The person does not have to be famous.)

Oh, I don't know...I don't book talent! Umm....someone who looks like Santa Claus?

1. Acquaintances have come to visit, bearing an unexpected holiday gift. "Unexpected" as in, "You don't have one for them." What do you do?

Feel embarrassed, apologize, and send them something later. Probably something home-baked.

2. A dear family member has gifted you with something truly hideous, which would never, ever go with your decor, your lifestyle, or your aesthetic. What do you do with it?

Give it away to someone else, most likely. Or just pack it away. Or find out if they meant it as a joke, which is possible with my family!

3. It's Christmas Eve. Rushing into a store to pick up some last-minute gifts, you are accosted by a gent who, politely, spins a tale of woe for you about being short on the rent. He sounds convincing. What do you do?

Ignore him and keep moving. I've seen scams and am immune to them, as much as I can be. This would have to be a scam.

1. New Years resolutions: worthwhile modifier of personal behavior, or fruitless way to set yourself up for failure?

Fruitless. If you can't commit on your own, then committing once a year isn't going to change anything.

2. What should you have resolved for the New Year? Not what you did resolve, mind you, but what should you have resolved?

Committing or not to some games. I let a lot slide, and I shouldn't have. I should also have resolved to stop spending so bloody much!

3. You're suddenly able to send a brief message back to yourself on 1 January 2002. What would you say?

OMG!! The Two Towwers is sooo awesome! Too bad you have to wait until December to see it!

*giggles*

No, really, I'd tell myself to save some cash for the car repairs in November, and save vacation for the wedding in November, so I wouldn't use up everything then.

1. Someone you deeply love is horribly murdered. The person you know did it gets off. Do you take justice/revenge into your own hands?

Would depend on how they got off on the charges. If it was a simple case of judicial foul-up (mistrial, for example), then I probably would consider it. If there were extenuating circumstances. Working with someone who is in the mental health profession has changed my view on some things.

But me, I'd rather find a way to make them rot in jail for the rest of their lives than just kill them outright. That's too easy...they'd be getting off way too easy.

2. If you learned you were going to die in two days, would you have any regrets? If you suddenly got a five year respite, could you avoid those same regrets?

I'd have a ton of regrets, what, are you kidding? But since there's only two days left, I wouldn't have a lot of chances to do anything about it.

Five years, I could so avoid a bunch of those. I'd go to Europe, finally visit Scotland, Australia, Egypt, Greece, Japan, etc. Climb a mountain (and not Mt. Monadnock). Learn to fly a plane.

And try not to rack up too much of a debt burden for my family in the process.

3. What's the greatest fashion faux pas -- wearing clothes too big, clothes too small, clothes ten years out of date, or clothes for someone ten years older than you?

Too small. Unless the clothes are from the 70s, which was an era which should never have happened, clothes-wise. Since I wear baggy clothes and my clothes are all out of date, the rest don't bother me.

1. Hanging out with your boss and co-workers, you're made very uncomfortable by some of the sexist humor being bandied about. What do you do?

Give as good as I get, and if I can't think of something offensive to give back, then just nod and walk away.

Problem is, I can't imagine this happening...

2. You are sure a neighbor child is being regularly abused by her parents, such that you worry for her health and life. The police and Child Protective Services are unable or unwilling to intervene. What would you do?

Ask Lou what to do. Talk it over with him. I'm sure he might know some other agencies we could call to get to intervene. Or know who to contact to get in touch with someone in our local police or agency to get them involved.

3. What modern invention would you most miss if it were removed from your life?

Define modern. Toilets and toilet paper are first-most. I could deal without TV or computers (not enjoy it, but deal) as long as I had books.

1. If there were to be a televised, public execution broadcast in prime time, would you watch it?

No. Just wouldn't, couldn't, do it.

2. If you could mold to your liking your memories of any past experiences, would you do so?

Sure. I'd modify the things in my head that I keep beating myself up over, so that I wouldn't do that. I'm not saying change the memory itself, more change my reaction to it. If I could do that, of course.

3. The excitement of the Holiday Season is long over. What "big day" are you looking forward to next?

February 22nd. 6th Anniversary, woo-hoo! And it's a Saturday, so we can actually DO something on the date and not work! Whee!

1. When was the last time you ever walked out of a movie while it was still playing on screen? Or have you ever?

I don't think I've ever walked out on a movie. I can't recall doing so. Not even for Highlander II.

2. What sort of things would you do if you could be as outgoing and uninhibited as you wish?

Probably not much more different than I am now. Maybe before I was married I'd have gone out to clubs more, dancing, etc. Now I'm just too old.

3. In an expensive restaurant, after a very nice, enjoyable meal, the waitress brings you your check. You notice you didn't get charged for one of the items. What, if anything, do you do?

I'd catch the waitress' attention and tell her about it. I've been a waitress before.

1. You're filing an expense report at work, and there are some items that you know you can fudge for an extra $5 or $10, without chance of being caught. Do you? What if you've done things for your employer in the past that you weren't compensated for?

I've fudged a bit, but not even $5/$10 worth. You get an allowance for meals, so I've added in a bit when I've forgotten to get a receipt for tea in the morning or something. It's not really fudging, I don't think.

But I don't get to do it a lot. Plus, I also don't bother to get reimbursed for the little I drive for work (back and forth to Service & Repair), so if I fudge a bit, I think it balances out.

2. You're reading something on a controversial topic that flies in the face of what you believe is true, but which has some interesting points to it that you didn't consider before. Do you keep reading?

Sure. If something makes me rethink my beliefs, I'd definitely keep reading.

3. What do you want the most? What if you knew you couldn't get it, no matter what you did?

The most? I want to have the money to be able to buy what I want, when I want it.

And I deal with not having that every day.

1. How responsible are you for the happiness of others?

Others in general? Not very. Others in specific, like Lou? Moreso. Not completely. I know you can't take complete responsibility for others happiness. Though sometimes we wish we could.

2. Where's the strangest place you've ever been?

Strangest? No idea. Umm...in the bowels of Penn Station, before they revamped it. That was very strange, and easy to get lost in. This would be like 15 years ago.

3. If you could only do vacation travel (a) to places you've been to before, or (b) to places you've never been before, which would you choose?

Never been. There's too many places I still want to see!

1. Someone at your office thinks the calendar you've put up is rude and tasteless, though HR hasn't -- yet -- agreed. Do you take it down? Does it matter what the subject matter is (art, humor, etc.)? Does it matter what you think of the other person?

Heh. I could so see that happening with my current calendar. Well, maybe only a little.

No. It's in my office, they don't need to see it often. It's mine, I keep it up.

2. A person at the office offers to loan you some software CDs for you to install at home. You know this is illegal, and there is a possibility that you could be caught doing it. Do you do it anyway?

Would depend on the CDs. Could I get them off of Limewire myself?

Hrm. I think that answers that question quite well.

3. Do you contribute to a charity? If so, how do you decide how much?

Not regularly, no. I'd give away more money if I had more money, I think. Right now, the biggest charity is me.

1. When someone compliments you, do you usually accept it, or suggest that you don't really deserve it?

I say that I don't really deserve it. I'm not that good with compliments, unless I really *know* that something was good.

2. Would you rather be overdressed for a social occasion (a party, let's say), or underdressed?

Underdressed. I prefer to be relaxed, even if no one else is. And if I'm overdressed, it's more difficult to fit in, I think.

3. A cop pulls you over, and is going to write you a $100 speeding ticket. If he indicated that if you slipped him $50 in cash, he'd give you a pass, would you do so? Would it make any difference whether you'd actually been speeding or not?

Heh...I don't even *HAVE* $50 in cash on me most times. No, I wouldn't. Not even if I was speeding. I'd be afraid he'd write the ticket anyway and then I'd have to pay $150.

Besides, I never speed.

*laughs and laughs and laughs*

1. Give me liberty, or give me death! Sentimental twaddle, or bold philosophical stand?

Both. I think it's a very bold stand, if you really mean it. But how many of us really do?

2. Marry in haste, repent at leisure, or He who hesitates is lost?

He who hesitates is lost. Most definitely.

3. What's more important to you in a potential romantic partner -- what religion they profess, what political party they belong to, or what operating system they use?

Heh. Operating system. It's my religion of choice!

1. You've been given $1 million to give anonymously to either charity or to a stranger. What would you do?

I'd choose the charity. If I don't know anything about the stranger, I'd go with the sure bet.

2. If the owner of a local gas station were caught dumping fifty gallons of used motor oil into the local storm sewer, what do you think the penalty should be? What if it were your neighbor dumping a single gallon?

The penalty'd need to be the cost of the cleanup for the dumped motor oil, or a fine equivalent. Maybe with a bit more on top, just to keep them frmo doing it again.

In both cases.

3. Over the course of your life, what have you probably spent more time pondering than anything else?

Pinky, are you pondering what I'm pondering?

Yeah Brain, but where are we going to find rubber pants in our size?

Probably my characters in role-playing games. Not any one in particular, but overall. Or RPGs in general.

1. Would you be willing to commit perjury for a friend? For example, would you testify under oath that your friend was driving carefully when she hit a pedestrian, even though she had actually been joking around and not paying attention?

No, I don't think I would be willing to lie in that case. I'd be more willing to state direct facts and leave out things, but I wouldn't lie.

2. Would you rather have a legal system that never punishes the innocent but often lets the guilty go free, or a system that sometimes punishes the innocent but never frees the guilty?

The former, rather than the latter. A lot really depends on the crime, but I do believe in rehabilitation, so I'd rather not leave the guilty to rot in prison.

3. On your death a memorial fund is going to be established in your name, with a substantial amount of money endowing it. For what cause would you want the money to be used?

Umm...I don't know. I don't have a "pet cause," so it's a tough decision. Probably something to do with space or space exploration.

1. If you could script the basic plot for the dream you will have tonight, what would it be?

Oh, I don't know. Maybe one where I could change my shape into an animal (or more than one) and fly around above everything and look down. Just 'cause I could. That'd be fun.

2. What one thing do you personally believe all people should do or experience at least once in their lifetime, just to say they've done it?

Ride a roller coaster.

3. If you knew it would, within twenty years, halve the incidence of violent crime, would you want to eliminate all physical violence from television and film?

No, I don't think I would. There would still be violent crime; it wouldn't eradicate it entirely.

Plus, I love the violence in film every now and then. It's a good stress reliever. Fight Club, anyone?

Besides, you'd have to take it out of cartoons, too. And that would be bad.

1. "Life is like a mountain." Discuss.

As you go through life, you find that it keeps peaking and peaking. There are always places to rest, but once you get to the top, it's all downhill from there.

2. "Life is like a river." Defend.

It moves continually, can sometimes throw you a curve you weren't expecting, has eddies and swirls and the occasional pocket where it's calm, but also has rapids (sometimes unexpected ones!). Often other rivers join together to make a mighty one, stronger than the one alone. And it all flows down into the sea.

3. "Life is like an open plain." Explain.

It's full of potential. Oh, I have no bloody clue.

1. You've been given the chance to go back to a point in your life and change a single decision you made; you'll lose everything that happened since then, but you'll get to live in the shiny new parallel timeline that develops. Would you? What would you change? And would you want to keep the memory of this timeline, too?

I'd go back and not get involved with someone - it was a bad idea and I should have stopped it before it started. I would definitely want to keep the memory of this timeline. It's likely a lot of events in my life would change, so I'd want to know about this one.

But all things considered, I don't think I'd change it, if I had the chance.

2. If you could legally sell your vote in the next Presidential election -- hand someone a signed, blank ballot in exchange for money -- would you do it? And what price would you ask?

No, I wouldn't do it. I thought the Nader vote exchange was ... incomprehensible, stupid, and just plain frelled up. A vote is not a commodity. It's intensely personal, and should not be bought or sold.

3. What one object to you own that has the most sentimental value to you?

For all that I'm a packrat, I'm sentimental at the oddest things. I think I'd have to say it'd be the cross with the "wampum" in the middle of it that my father bought for me. I've no idea why he did it - he was on a business trip (he took very few of them) and brought back the cross for me and something else for my sister. I am not particularly religious, nor was he, so it's an odd thing, but it's pretty much the only thing I have that he gave directly to me.

Well, the laptop fan decided to start working again. Not long after I posted the "I'll be gone" message, actually. That evening, I heard it start up, and it hasn't "died" since.

I think it was because I brought a TiBook home and leaned Tallis (the laptop) up against it, and Tallis knew I was serious. Either that, or burning a CD and tilting the laptop up on its side to keep it going while it was burning fixed it somehow. I don't know.

So I'm back in business. At least for now.

1. To what organization do you feel the deepest loyalty? What ties you most to that group?

My family is so large it might be considered an organization! But other than that, I don't really belong to any formal organizations, so I don't really have a response for this.

2. Would you euthanize your healthy, happy pet for $50k? How about $1 million?

Damn, tough question! No, I wouldn't. Not for the money. Athena and Artemis give me more than money can buy.

3. Of all the US presidents during your lifetime, which one is/was your favorite?

Bill Clinton (watching one of my older brothers eyes roll at that). Though I have a soft spot for Jimmy Carter because my uncle worked for him.

1. What is one event in the future whose outcome you would like to know right now?

WHAT THE FRELL HAPPENED ON ALIAS! No, wait, WHAT THE FRELL HAPPENED ON FARSCAPE!!??

Ahem.

Other that the imaginary kind, I'd like to know if we ever manage to explore outside of our own local space. Even manned missions to Mars or Jupiter; I don't need to know if we go out of our solar system.

2. If you were exiled from your country, and had only limited financial resources, where would you try to rebuild your life?

Do I get a free trip to whatever country I'm going to?

Hmm...tough question. Hong Kong would be fun to try. But I'd be more likely to head to Great Britain and try to get started over there. The whole language barrier thing.

3. An eccentric millionaire hires you to spend $10 million to help society. What would you do with it?

Help fund free health clinics in as many places as I could manage.

1. If you knew that millions of faithful followers were going to model their lives after you, would you change anything about how you live it?

*blinks* Millions? Oh frell...

You know, I don't think I'd change much. If they are following ME, then they're following me for a reason. And changing the way I live my life would mean that they wouldn't be following me anymore.

But maybe I'd clean up the apartment more.

2. When you find you don't need something any more, is your impulse to throw it out, give it away, store it somewhere, or sell it?

Store it. I am a packrat. I keep everything.

3. What world record would you most like to set?

Longest healthy life. Such a cheat, I know...